Hereafter

The Pastor came to visit the other day. 

He said that at my advanced age I should be thinking of the hereafter. 

I told him, "Oh, I do it all the time. "No matter where I am - in the living room, upstairs, in the kitchen, or down in the basement, I am always asking myself: "Now, what am I here after?"

Keep Your Fork

A woman was diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. As she was getting her things in order, she contacted her pastor and asked him to come to her house to discuss some of her final wishes.

She told him which songs she wanted sung at her funeral service, what Scripture verses she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. She requested to be buried with her favorite Bible.

As the pastor prepared to leave, the woman suddenly remembered something else. "There's one more thing," she said excitedly.

"What's that?" said the pastor.

"This is important," the woman said. "I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand."

The pastor stood looking at the woman, not knowing quite what to say.

The woman explained. "In all my years of attending church socials and potluck dinners, when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, 'Keep your fork.' It was my favorite part of the meal because I knew something better was coming—like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie.

"So, when people see me in that casket with a fork in my hand and they ask, 'What's with the fork?' I want you to tell them: 'Keep your fork. The best is yet to come!'" 

(Alan Carr, Biblical Facts about a Place Called Heaven, via Sermons.com newsletter)

The Other Side

A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, "Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side." Very quietly, the doctor said, "I don't know."
"You don't know? You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?"

The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side of which came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said, "Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside. He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing ... I know my Master is there and that is enough."

Do not be afraid, Jesus said, "I will never leave you."

What Lies On The Other Side?

A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, "Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side."

Very quietly the doctor said, "I don't know."

"You don't know? You, a Christian man, does not know what is on the other side?"

The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side of which came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door a dog sprang into the room and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said, "Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside.

He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened he sprang in without fear."

"I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing: I know my Master is there, and that is enough. And when the door opens, I will pass through it with gladness, but with no fear."

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen! (Heb. 11:1)

See You In The Morning

Dr. W. A Criswell, Pastor of the First Baptist Church of Dallas Texas, said on one occasion on an airplane flight he found himself seated beside a well-known theologian. 


He desperately wanted to start a conversation and they did get to talk. The man told Dr. Criswell about how he had recently lost his little boy through death. 


Dr. Criswell listened as he told his story: He said he had come home from school with a fever and we thought it was just one of those childhood things, but it was a very virulent form of meningitis. The doctor said we cannot save your little boy. He'll die. 


And so this seminary professor, loving his son as he did, sat by the bedside to watch this death vigil. 


It was the middle of the day and the little boy whose strength was going from him and whose vision and brain was getting clouded said, "Daddy, it's getting dark isn't it?" The professor said to his son, "Yes son it is getting dark, very dark." 


Of course it was very dark for him. He said, "Daddy, I guess it's time for me to go to sleep isn't it?" 


He said, "Yes, son, it's time for you to go to sleep." 


The professor said the little fellow had a way of fixing his pillow just so, and putting his head on his hands when he slept and he fixed his pillow like that and laid his head on his hands and said, "Good night Daddy. I will see you in the morning." 


He then closed his eyes in death and stepped over into heaven. 


Dr. Criswell said the professor didn't say anymore after that. He just looked out the window of that airplane for a long time. 


Then he turned back and he looked at Dr Criswell with the scalding tears coming down his cheeks and he said, "Dr. Criswell, I can hardly wait till the morning." 


Let's face it... 


We will all face trials that will test our patience and faith in God. 


There will be times that we can't explain why we're going through such enormous pain. 


And the only thing that we can do in this situation is... 


...to stay strong in our faith in our creator. 


Keeping your eyes in God requires more time and serious commitment in reading His Words. Because faith is develop by regularly reading and meditating God's Word. 

Different Rewards In Eternity

A Catholic, a Baptist, and a Presbyterian all die and go to heaven. Saint Peter comes around to the Pearly Gates and leads them through to a hallway lined with doors. These, he explains, lead to the place you'll spend eternity in.


He asks the Catholic, "What denomination were you?"


"Roman Catholic."


Peter points to a heavily carved dark wooden door and says, "Step in there." The Catholic opens it up to find a chapel lined with stained-glass windows and candles. He gasps with delight, "A church!" and runs inside, kneels and starts counting his rosary.


Peter turns to the Baptist and gets his denomination, then points to another door. The Baptist opens it to find a canvas tent filled with people singing and waving their arms to a swaying choir and a shouting pastor. "A revival meeting!" He runs and joins the crowd.


Finally Peter asks the Presbyterian, "And what were you?"


"Presbyterian."


Peter leads him to another door and pulls it open. Inside is a big, round table with people seated around shuffling papers and arguing. The Presbyterian claps his hands to his face in happiness.


"A committee!"

Heaven's Gate

I dreamt death came the other night,

And Heaven’s Gate swung wide-

An Angel with a halo bright

Ushered me inside.

And, there, to my astonishment,

Stood folks I’d judged and labeled;

As “quite unfit,” “of little worth”

And, “spiritually disabled!!”

Indignant words rose to my lips,

But never were set free,

For every face showed stunned surprise;

Not one expected ME!

Really Brave Guy

This guy arrives at the Pearly Gates. He has to wait to be admitted, while Saint Peter leafs through his Big Book.

He's checking to see if the guy is worthy of entry or not. Saint Peter goes through the books several times, furrows his brow, and says to the guy, "You know, I can't see that you did lots of good in your life but, you never did anything bad either.

Tell you what, if you can tell me of one REALLY good deed that you did in your life, you're in."

The guy thinks for a moment and says, "Well, there was this one time when I was driving down the highway and I saw a Biker Gang assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going on, and sure enough, that's what they were doing. There were about fifty of them torturing this chick.

Infuriated, I got out my car, grabbed a tire iron from my trunk and walked straight up to the leader of the gang. He was a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the Gang formed a circle all around me.

So I ripped the leader's chain off his face and smashed him over the head with the tire iron. Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, 'Leave this poor, innocent girl alone, you slime! You're all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I teach you all a lesson in pain!'"

Saint Peter, extremely impressed, says, "Really? Wow, when did all this happen?"

"Er.. about two minutes ago."

Trusting God in the Flood

It had been raining for days and days, and a terrible flood had come over the land. The waters rose so high that one man was forced to climb onto the roof of his house.

As the waters rose higher and higher, a man in a rowboat appeared, and told him to get in. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the rowboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.

The waters rose higher and higher, and suddenly a speedboat appeared. "Climb in!" shouted a man in the boat. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the man in the speedboat went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.

The waters continued to rise. A helicopter appeared and over the loudspeaker, the pilot announced he would lower a rope to the man on the roof. "No," replied the man on the roof. "I have faith in the Lord; the Lord will save me." So the helicopter went away. The man on the roof prayed for God to save him.

The waters rose higher and higher, and eventually they rose so high that the man on the roof was washed away, and alas, the poor man drowned.

Upon arriving in heaven, the man marched straight over to God. "Heavenly Father," he said, "I had faith in you, I prayed to you to save me, and yet you did nothing. Why?" 

God gave him a puzzled look, and replied "I sent you two boats and a helicopter, what more did you expect?"

One Hundred Points

This guy dies and goes to heaven where he meets Peter at the Pearly Gates. Before he can enter Peter gives him a few questions to answer. He has to accumulate 100 points before he can go in.

"So, how often did you go to church?" Peter asks.

"I went every Sunday and Wednesday," replied the man.

"That's one point," answers Peter.

"One point? wow! I figured it would be worth more than that."

"And did you give in the offerings?" asked Peter.

"Yes, I gave 10% of all my income every week," answered the man.

"Well, let's see," answers Peter, "that's worth 3 points. Did you do anything else?"

"Well, right off hand, I can't think of a whole lot. I did mostly what I thought I was supposed to do."

"Well, we'll give you 5 points for good behavior, can't you come up with something else?"

By this time, the man is completely flustered. He finally cries, "Well, I can't come up with anything else. It looks like that no one can enter heaven except by the Grace of God!"

"100 points! Come on in!"

Wit & Wisdom - May 5, 1998

Because My Father Says So!

Jaeden

I asked Jaeden where his father was. The six-year old replied, "In Vietnam."

To further the conversation, I asked, "Do you know where is Vietnam?"

Jaeden said without any hesitation, "Yes!"

I was curious and asked further, "Have you been to Vietnam?"

With a quick innocent glance, Jaeden said, "No!".

"If you have not been there, how do you know where Vietnam is?" I jested.

Unperturbed, Jaeden said, "Because my father says so!"

Now imagine someone asks you about God the Father:

"Where is your Father?"

 "In Heaven!"

"Do you know where is Heaven?"

"No!"

"If you have not been there, how do you know where Heaven is?"

"Because my Father says so!"

That is faith because we absolutely believe that our Father in Heaven would not lie to us and that He knows where Heaven is.