Spilled Coffee and Compassion

How you perceive a situation will determine your experience and your reaction. Let's imagine that you have a favorite coffeehouse that you frequent. The staff knows your name and always has a warm and friendly greeting as you walk through the door. An extremely grumpy woman whom you have never seen before serves you this particular morning. She appears preoccupied rather than caring about you or what she is doing. As she pours your hot coffee a good portion spills in your lap. Despite your jumping in shock, no apology follows. Your experience is anger: both toward the waitress and the owner, Joe, for hiring such an incompetent person. Then, a friend of yours at the next booth says, "Isn't it great that Joe hired her!"

"Great! Are you out of your mind? She just spilled hot coffee in my lap and walked away," you reply with your best indignant voice.

"Oh, you didn't hear the story?" your friend whispers.

"What story?" you angrily reply, still drying off your new slacks, wondering how you will go through the day looking as though you wet your pants.

"Yeah, Joe didn't know her from Adam. He read in the paper that her husband had died last month in a car accident. Apparently her husband's health insurance stopped, and she was looking for another job in order to pay for her sixteen-year-old son's chemotherapy for leukemia," your friend responds.

Now, you still have hot coffee in your crotch, but are you still angry? Unlikely. The only thing that shifted was your perception and attitude. Through discovering a reason to be compassionate, your entire experience changed—and there are always reasons to be compassionate.

An important part of healing (i.e., letting go of fear) is developing compassion. Instead of going out in the world and finding plenty of reasons to be upset, go out and discover reasons to extend love. There are thousands of reasons waiting for you right now. A helpful thought to remember is that a miracle is nothing more than allowing an old grievance to become a current compassion.

If you ever run short on reasons to be compassionate, remember there is always one good reason: It makes you feel better than anything else you could do.

Lee Jampolsky

Excuse For Having A Bad Temper

Evangelist Billy Sunday

Around the turn of the century, the Church was graced with an array of great preachers, but none were more tenacious and outspoken than Billy Sunday. He seemed to have a way of driving home a point. 

It is said that a woman once approached him after one of his meetings who was well known for her bad temper. She sought to defend her actions by saying: “But Mr. Sunday, although I blow up over the least little thing, it’s all over in a minute.”

The evangelist looked her straight in the eye and said, “So is a shotgun blast! It’s over in seconds, too, but look at the terrible damage it can do.”

If Only They Have Read

When the now-famous poet Elizabeth Barrett became the wife of Robert Browning, her parents disowned her because they disapproved of the marriage.

Their daughter Elizabeth, however, wrote almost every week, telling them that she loved them and longed for a reconciliation.

After 10 years, she received a huge box in the mail that contained all the notes she had sent. Not one had been opened!

Although these "love letters" have now become a precious part of classical English literature, it's really sad to think that they were never read by Elizabeth Barrett's own parents.

Had they looked at just one, the broken relationship with their daughter might have been healed.

All of us are alienated from God because of sin, but God has provided a way of reconciliation. In the Bible, He tells about it, and also expresses His earnest desire for fellowship with us.

The question is, are you reading God's letter to you regularly?

Are you meditating His Words daily?

If not, let this message today be of an encouragement to you.

Begin memorizing and meditating God's Word and feel His presence wherever you go. 

Don and Dawn

OCTOBER BABY - THE STORY OF AN ABORTION SURVIVOR

OCTOBER BABY - THE STORY OF AN ABORTION SURVIVOR

Gianna Jessen

Gianna Jessen survived an abortion nearly 35 years ago. She was only two pounds when she was born with Cerebral Palsy, and doctors said she would never be able to hold up her head, crawl or walk. But she overcame all these obstacles. 

Then one day she met her birth mom, who had tried to abort her but she had survived that saline attempt. The bitterness, however, lived on. Strangely, it was the mother who was bitter. 

She told Jessen, “You are an embarrassment to me!” 

Jessen was so hurt by those biting words that greeted her from her birth mother. 

Fighting back the tears, Jessen regained her composure just long enough to tell her mother: “I forgive you.”

“I don’t want you to forgive me,” her birth mom responded. “I don’t want you to talk to me.”

And just like that, the conversation was over. Jessen has not seen her birth mother since. 

She could have chosen to be furious with her birth mother but she decided not to hold a grudge.

“There was so much anger on her side,” Jessen said.

Instead, she decided to forgive, just as she has been forgiven by her heavenly Father: “Over and over, I’ve chosen to let the Lord define me,” she said. “The Lord spoke to me, ‘You have to let it go.’”

By age 3, she was able to walk with the help of leg braces and a walker and by age 28—April 30, 2005—Jessen completed her first marathon (Boston), then ran another one (London) the following April.

For Jessen, it’s been a long journey: “When your father and mother forsake you, God takes you up.”

Sources: http://charismanews.com/culture/33049-the-story-behind-october-baby

http://www.giannajessen.com/main/index.html

The 37 Nails

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger,they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there."

A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.

Why Do We Shout During An Argument?

Once a professor asked his students: "Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?" The students thought for a while before one of them said: "We shout because we lost our calm."

"But why shout when the other person is just next to you? Isn't it possible to speak to him or her in a soft voice?"

The students gave various answer, none of which satisfied the professor.

Finally he explained: When two people are angry with each other, their hearts distance. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the louder they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance."

Then he asked: What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly. Why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small.

When they love each other even more, what happen? They do not speak - they only whisper and get closer to each other in their love.

"Finally they do not even need to whisper. They only look at each other, that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other."

So when you argue, do not let your hearts get distanced or say words that distance each other even more, or there may come a day when the distance is so great you will not find the path back to each other.

Which Wolf Would You Feed?

An old Cherokee chief is teaching his grandson about life: 

"A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

"One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego."

"The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith."

"This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old chief simply replied, "The one you feed."

Are you feeding on the Word of God today? Only God's Word can transform you and build that faith life within you. 

Unique Way To Hurt The Husband

Newspaper columnist and minister George Crane tells of a wife who came into his office full of hatred toward her husband. "I do not only want to get rid of him, I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has me."

Dr. Crane suggested an ingenious plan "Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every decent trait. Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible. Spare no efforts to please him, to enjoy him. Make him believe you love him. After you've convinced him of your undying love and that you cannot live without him, then drop the bomb. Tell him that you're getting a divorce. That will really hurt him." 

With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, "Beautiful, beautiful. Will he ever be surprised!" And she did it with enthusiasm. 

Acting "as if." For two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcing, sharing. When she didn't return, Crane called. "Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?" 

"Divorce?" she exclaimed. "Never! I discovered I really do love him." Her actions had changed her feelings. Motion resulted in emotion. The ability to love is established not so much by fervent promise as often repeated deeds. 

J. Allan Petersen.

Nikita's Fear

During his years as premier of the Soviet Union, Nikita Khrushchev denounced many of the policies and atrocities of Joseph Stalin. 

Once, as he censured Stalin in a public meeting, Khrushchev was interrupted by a shout from a heckler in the audience. "You were one of Stalin's colleagues. Why didn't you stop him?" 

"Who said that?" roared Khrushchev. An agonizing silence followed as nobody in the room dared move a muscle. 

Then Khrushchev replied quietly, "Now you know why." 

   

Today in the Word, July 13, 1993.

Forgiveness and Reconciliation

When a believer considers how much God has forgiven him, he is able to extend pardon to others no matter what they have done. 

A Christian husband found this to be true when his wife, who had become an alcoholic, told him of an affair she had had with his best friend ten years earlier. She said she experienced such feelings of guilt that the bottle was a means of escape. Anger and resentment began to sweep over him, for his wife’s drinking had embittered their children and nearly destroyed their home. He was also deeply hurt by the fact that his close friend had betrayed his trust. Then he remembered Jesus’ words, "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." As he thought of God’s mercy toward him, he prayed for grace to do the Christlike thing. 

Here is his description of what happened the next time he met the man who had caused him such heartache: "With a sob in my soul, I reached out my hand and gripped his, and for the first time in my life I knew what it was to forgive. I

felt a tremendous sense of release as the unbearable weight of bitterness was lifted from my heart. This freedom enabled me to renew my love for my wife, and to overcome the barrier that had arisen between us. When I said to her, 'I forgive you and will accept you just as I did when I pledged to love and cherish you unto death,’ the healing process began its wonderful work."

Lincoln's Two Letters

When Abraham Lincoln had to write a letter to someone who had irritated him, he would often write two letters. 

The first letter was deliberately insulting. Then, having gotten those feelings out of his system, he would tear it up and write a second letter, this one tactful and discreet.

John Luther in Bits and Pieces, Oct 1990